I Feel All Colonial

"I'm wearing a robe!  I feel all colonial.  I just want to put my foot on top of you and say, I claim this in the name of Danny, for the land of Garrison.  The Buck is underfoot".

Danny said this to me last night.  

When he did, I immediately conjured a vision of Ratcliffe from Disney's Pocahontas...

Then, I thought of Captain Morgan.

This, is Danny (and his dad)...

I love him so much.  I would say that it's stupid, but it actually makes complete sense because, did you see that quote right there?  That is awesome!  So unbelievably wonderful.  Historical, hilarious, and just lovely.  He's perfect for me.

See?

Other things that have happened to me over the past few days...

I knocked over a display of turnips at the local grocer.  It wasn't a supermarket, it was a little family-owned fruit and veggie stand that sells them super-cheap.  This place may be called Mango King.  Okay, it's called Mango King.  

So, I was at the bodega/ grocer formally known as Mango King, and I reached to grab a turnip.  It was a slightly colder day than usual, so I planned to make a stew of winter vegetables.  I was buying leeks, scallions, beets, yams, potatoes and ginger.  Oh, and the ill-fated turnips.  I wanted three turnips.  I grabbed at the one that looked the best, like most good shoppers of produce do.  My mother trained me well.  Unfortunately, I didn't notice exactly how the stack seemed to be balanced.  Though the turnip I chose was sort of on the top level, and by sort of, what I mean is not really, but it was certainly not on the bottom level where one would expect to create an avalanche.  But, I did not properly calculate the angle at which the turnip display was positioned, and turnips rained down on me. 

Courtesy of Jeanette Bowman.  So perfect...

 Turnips happen to be round, and they didn't just fall on me. They fell into the kale, into the dandelion greens, onto the floor,  rolled across the floor, landed under the nut and seed display, hid beneath a cooler, and even traipsed their jolly way into the break room.  

I ran frantically all over the place to try and correct what I had done before the employees noticed, but, seeing as how a bunch of turnips had just tally-hoed their way into their break room, the employees had become aware of the situation.  They helped me clean it up, and were really cool about it.  For a moment, I wondered if they would make me buy all of the turnips that had rolled onto the floor.  This would then have required some creativity I'm not sure if I possess.  Cooking with vegetables is a skill at which I am acquiring new dots and proficiencies daily, but I'm not certain if I could utilize multiple dozen turnips before they went bad.  Turnips are just not... they are one of the least exciting vegetables.  I use them because they are cheap and soak up whatever sauce they are in, but as a standalone, they are really rather bland and uninspiring.

In other news- I now have joined Pinterest! 

Dressed to at

 My main board is recipes because cooking is fun.  Also, cooking saves money.  Having fun and saving moolah are two of my favourite past-times, so, yeah.  Cooking.  I like vegetables.  They taste great and make my thighs look tasty too.  Great.  They make my thighs look great.  Not tasty.  

Like that looks!

Other other news, I finally started reading Game of Thrones.  

I know that I am a few years late to this party, but woah.  WHY AM I LATE TO THIS PARTY?  This is such a marvelous party!  I guess this makes me fashionably late?  No?  Okay.  Game of Thrones is fabulous.  I'm riveted.  Good thing I have to fill at least an hour and a half of subway rides every day with stuff like reading.  I'll massacre this series in no time.

Also, I feel like I missed a seriously amazing and perfect casting opportunity here.  Not that I'm doing a whole lot of acting these days, I'm focusing on teaching, and loving every moment of it, but this is the type of piece I'd like to be in.  It's also my type.

That's me.

That's a screenshot from the show.

I'm just saying.

More things to share- I'm feeling better!  Finally!  I took the morning off from work again yesterday, which I felt awful about, but now I'm feeling in tip-top shape.  Refreshed, healthy, and invigorated.  So, hooray to that.  Yes.  Double yes.

Yeah.  I am wearing a Batman shirt.  Because, Batman.

Also, I'm writing an essay right now, which is mind-boggling, because the last time I wrote an essay was in college, which I graduated from almost two years ago.  My mind isn't boggled by the fact that I've been out for so long- that feels proper and excellent.  I just seem to have forgotten how to write a cohesive essay in a manner that takes forever.  In high school and college, I never became exceptionally proficient at whipping out papers.  I actually found myself having to work on them if I wanted them to be anything other than a vile piece of word barf.  This essay is for Yoga Teacher training, and, well, I cranked it out.  It is taking no time, and was nearly done stream-of-consciousness, with then, a few tweaks added in subsequent read-throughs.  Perhaps it is because I am writing on this so often.  In any case.  Yes.  This is thrilling.  All I had to do was graduate college to master faster than light essay-composition.

Thanks for all ya do, readers!

~Emily

I Really Am Ok...

So, there seemed to be a little bit of confusion over the last post.  The tone in which I wrote the piece was one of humor and exaggeration, like the pieces on Cracked, or Hyperbole and a Half, Regretsy, or Cakewrecks.  It's what I see as typical "internet humor".

(from Hyperbole and a Half)

Darnit, I was attempting to be funny.  I find that I'm at my funniest when I allow myself to unhinge a little bit and just go.  Desperate people, to me, are hilarious, because we understand a little bit of what they are going through.  And funny is exactly that.  A commentary on our shared human experience that consists mostly of, "Oh, haha yeah.  I get that.  I understand this.  That's funny".  That's why, despite what many people say, Chekhov can be funny.  People are at their most laughable when they are collapsing in a heap over something that doesn't really matter.

From the I love Cats video.  Which, you should watch.

In any case, I'm really ok.  I still have food poisoning this morning, still feel sick, which was rather unexpected, but other than that, I'm great.  Decompression has occurred at least a little bit over the past few days, which has been needed, and wonderful. Before that, I was a tad more than a tad stressed, maybe to the point of moderately overwhelmed, but who isn't sometimes?  I dealt with it, and what needed to be done got done.  This makes me feel pretty good about things, I must say.  Like having a lovely day frolicking in the snow with Danny kind of good.

All smiles.

For those of you who read into that as me going nuts... I was just drabbling.  I don't post hyper-personal things on this blog because 1. people I know read it, and that's just weird, and 2. the internet has no mercy.  Frankly, the chances of me telling someone in the real world that I'm not okay are rather low as well.  It's just not something I talk about, or have ever talked about.  My own mental well-being is my business, and my problem.  I don't want you to think I'm crazy or unhinged, or have any kind of issues, because those labels are super-judgy, and I am 99% certain this would make me feel significantly worse.  So, rest assured that even if I was going crazy, which, I'm legitimately not, you would have no idea.  It definitely wouldn't be published here.  Here, I do funny.  Truths, yes.  Photographs?  Yup.  Understanding?  Absolutely.  A deep, dark glimpse into my actual psyche?  No.

Sorry about that.  Don't take me seriously.  There's heavy sarcasm in everything I most here that is the least bit comedic.  

Just wanted to make that abundantly clear.

However, thanks for being worried about me, o, powers that worried about me.  It's nice to know that you care.  I appreciate it.  It's flattering, really it is.  So, uh, thanks.  Thanks for that.

Thanks for all you do, readers!

~Emily

Still Alive, for Now

Oh.  Hey there!  Uh... yeah.  It's been a long time.  Quite a few weeks now.  I mean, since my last post.  

I'm alive.  I promise.  Stressed as sh*t, but still alive.  Yeah, I just used an asterisk there.  That happened.

So, um, yes.  Nope.  I haven't posted on here in awhile.  It's been a few weeks.  I already said that didn't I?  

Crap.  

I'm still alive here!  For now.

Ok, anyways.  I'm posting now.  Look at me!  I AM SO BLOGGING RIGHT NOW.  

BLOG.  BLOG BLOG BLOG.

BLOG.

BLOG BLOG.

... BLOG.

Chill out, self.  Calm down.

Sorry about that little outburst there everyone, but it's pretty indicative of my own mental state at the moment.  Things have been downright flipping ridiculous in my neck of the woods.  Namely- I'm stressed out.  

Remember when I said that I was going to be doing all of the things with all of my time, in that post a little while back?  It was titled "Responsibility Champion".  Well, I've been downright responsible, and have been accomplishing all of the things.  Every one of them.  Each and every thing that I've set out to do.  

All of the things.  

^^ surprisingly accurate depiction of me courtesy of Hyperbole and a Half^^

However, I didn't really take any breaks during this process to do some of the things that chill me out like, for example, photography, or, writing on this blog.  I've been neglecting this, and yet somehow still managing to feel as if I have some responsibility to maintain it because I've learned that people actually read it, including my family members (Hi mom!  Hi grammy!).  

Thus, I've been driving myself simply bananas.  I need a break.  And, the past two days, I've gotten one, thanks to an unexpected bout of food poisoning.  So, though I have not been as relaxed as I would have hoped due to the vomiting and constant stomach gargling, shaking, and general uncomfortable-ness(?), I've been able to sit on my butt and do very little other than live in the now and chill out to the best of my ability.  

By this, I mean that I've finally had a chance to power through some of Mass Effect 3.  WOW.  It's so good.  Guys, guys, guys.... it's so good.  Girls too.  Video games have some of the the best storytelling in the storytelling industry today, and some of the best acting too.  Mass Effect 3 has made me bawl, that's right, full-on bawl, twice.  Not once, twice.  I was crying like an adult man.  I know that people generally say that they were weeping like a baby, but babies just don't understand pain accutely enough to describe how I was bawling.  I was moaning, weeping, and screaming inside like a man who has worked his whole life to provide for his family, and then ended up at a breaking point in a way that only could be written by Arthur Miller.  I was crying like Daniel Day-Lewis's John Proctor in the film version of "The Crucible".  

There was that much torment.  Really.  You think I'm kidding, and unfortunately, I was alone, so I have no witnesses.  I wish I was joking.  Watching one of my friends take the fall to save a nation whilst singing Gilbert and Sullivan was one of the most heroic and incredible things I have ever seen an individual do.  

I want to not write this because of the spoiler factor, but really, I don't think that anyone who reads this is still playing ME3.  You either don't know what the frap I'm talking about, or you've finished this game and are potentially a little surprised and/ or annoyed by my confession that I'm a mere 23 hours into the drama.  This scientist salarian was a bamfy, awesome, principled dude, and I was proud to know him.  It had to be him, and he knew it.  Someone else might have gotten it wrong... 

Oh god, I'm crying again.  Ahhhh.  Just play it.  Buy yourself a goshdarned X-Box and play some Mass Effect.  I'm a strong lady, and I'm a puddle of mush on the floor at the moment just reliving the trauma of watching this fictional character bite it.  Something has gone terribly right here.

This game has also provided me with some hilariously awesome screenshots, like this deliciously inappropriate one right here-

(Sorry, mom.  Don't judge...)

Yes, my Femshep is dating Garrus.  Because, duh.

I'm getting my break.  It's happening in bits and pieces.  Yoga school starts up super-full-time on Saturday, which will be many hours, but should be relaxing, since it is, well, yoga.

Or, maybe not. In any case, it's going to be fun.

This post is kind of where this blog is going, kids.  I'm still going to show lots of photographs.  I like taking them, and I like sharing them.  Most importantly, I have some new ones now!  Woo!  Actual stuff to share!  But, I'm not going to pretend I'm not a big old weird nerd.  Fashion is great, and creamy yummy loveliness happy dolphin puppy rainbow flower unicorn happiness pile, but goshdarnit, I like action and most of my friends are dudes.  I wear all black most of the time.  Let's get real.  What do I think is pretty?  Cemeteries.    What do I do in my spare time?  Fight people.  

Because I've come to the wonderful conclusion that yes, becoming an adult is about growing up.  You have to pay your bills and wash your clothes and dishes and not spend money on ridiculous things otherwise your life will explode.  You have to show up to work.  But, being an adult is also about doing some of the crazy and ridiculous stuff you wanted to do when you are a kid, because your money and time are your own, and nothing is holding you back.  Well, until you have kids.  I don't want any though, so, uh...

Yep.  There we go.  That's the plan for the next ten years.  Be that.  Actually not kidding.  

Welcome to Travel and Toile version... whatever.

Thanks for all ya do, readers!

~Emily

Inspiration Fridays: When I Have Money

I came to a rather harrowing realization this morning- I am close to broke.  (Sorry mom, dad, grammy and grampop...)  Now, close is a relative term- I am not in debt, I am paying rent successfully, I'm not starving, I have a gym membership and am in school again.  So, yeah.  Not really broke.  But, I have a small enough amount of money that all of those attempts at "watching it" I've been making lately have suddenly become absolute necessity.  Honestly, this has been going well.  I've been watching it, and saving some dough.  At this point, I have to.

This post was originally intended to be a "stuff I will buy when I get money" inspiration post.  A lot of bloggers I know do this- they post about things they want, and are working towards owning.  Clothes they wish for, necklaces they found on Etsy.  Frankly, it's usually clothes or cameras or random crafty stuff they found on Etsy.  I tried to compile that post.  I did.  I'm just not materialistic enough to do it.  I have barely been clothes shopping lately, and god knows I need some new socks.  This should be done.  However, I own such a ridiculous number of clothing items that I can't justify it; not to mention that I have no particular desires at the moment style-wise.  My closet is pretty great.  There are quite a number of nifty pieces in there, and everything I own matches in some bizarre way to equal one closet full to the brim with semi-gothy outfits.  Only semi, because they manage to look within  the general bounds of normal 99% of the time.  That one percent day is the one where I allow it to shine and, you know, wear pirate stockings.  Which, I may have bought as an impulse buy on Etsy.  Okay- I might be materialistic.

What I really desire, and crave is experience.  Learning.  Living.  Going.  Doing.  I want to move and I need to see.  Talking.  Listening.  Giving.  Receiving.  THAT is what I plan to do with future money acquisitions.  Save, and then spend those hard-earned dollars on travel, or eating a nice meal out with a friend, seeing a show, taking a class, what have you.  I own too much stuff.  Too much.  I think it's a disease, buying crap.  Then, you're stuck with it, and feel like you should attempt to sell it- but it's so much work!  Organizing a yard sale takes forever, and carting massive bags of stuff to Buffalo Exchange almost requires a day off from work it's so tedious.  There are two of said massive bags of clothing in my storage closet from our last move that I keep meaning to get rid of, but I haven't yet.  They are sitting there.  Inhabiting space that I could be using for something, you know, useful.  That'd be cool.

In any case, guys, I have a wanderlust and a need for adventure.  This may be why I am an actor, why I do martial arts, and why I do yoga.   I like to have experiences that most people will never have.  Fighting.  How many people have legitimately been in a fight?  Like, one that lasted beyond the initial punch?  I fight multiple times a week, something I certainly thought I would never say.  It's in a controlled environment, yes, but when you're working against a guy who is a foot taller than you, and weighs 100 pounds more than you, or when you are fighting against a woman smaller than you who has been training for 20 years, it doesn't feel fake.  It's not.  Before I started, the idea of legitimately hitting someone blew my mind.  You know what?  It's one of the most exhilarating things that I have ever experienced.


Everyone should try this.  Everyone.  I get to feel like a bleeping ninja multiple days a week, not because of an avatar on the screen, but because my actual, physical body, those muscles and bones that are me, are really doing ninja shit.  It's freaking awesome.  

So, these are some things I want to do when I have enough money.  They are not things I want to have.  They are things I want to do.

Yoga teacher training

(in progress!  YES!!!)

New Element Yoga

Work with Andrew Wade for a full week next week!

(okay, this is free for me, but holy cow, is it awesome and going to be the most fulfilling)

Backstage

Savate Seminar with Nicolas Saignac at my martial arts school!

(this is in two weeks.  note to self: pay for this on Monday.  French kickboxing.  Yes.)

 UCLA

Go along with Danny when he might have to go to Los Angeles

(soonest!  must save so fast!  I've never been there...)

 

 Public Domain Photos

Get up to Maine to visit my grandparents at their house on the lake

(it's been a year and a half, and it's time.  also, it's so peaceful there.  so much nature)

 Millsaps

 Get down to Texas again sometime in the near future.

(because I just love Austin.  seriously,  such an amazing town.  also, it makes Danny the happiest.)

Last City Standing

Visit my sister when she studies abroad in The Netherlands next spring

(saving now, this is soon!  love her a lot, but this is also a great excuse to go back there)

 Trip extras

 

Get a Masters in Voice at the Central School of Speech and Drama

(this is in the 10 year plan... preferably the 5 year, but we'll see.  Post- Danny black belt...)

Eye Magazine

Before attending grad school, tour Europe.

(this is the big one.  all of the saving ever must happen.)

Mr. VPN

During said tour, explore more of Wales

(liked it, need more than just one day in Cardiff.  was not enough)

Teenager Break

I have the exact same feeling about Scotland

(one day in Edinburgh- one of my favourite days during my entire time in Europe!  I need more)

Explore the "mystical" towns/ cities in England

(though I love this stuff, I ignored Glastonbury, Avebury and Salisbury last time.  must be remedied)

Wikimedia

Sit in a cafe for hours in Provence, France.  Preferably outdoors.

(because, yes.  this is what I want from life, basically)

Wikimedia

Rome, Italy.

(yeah.  haven't been there yet.  this must be remedied.)

Venere

Barcelona, Spain.

(Barcelona or bust! I know so many people who have been, and they have raved.)

Travel Destination Info

Paris, France.

(I just can't get enough.  been there twice.  not enough.)

Fruhling in Paris

 

Helsinki, Finland.

(most popular clothing style is "cyber alien" and their top selling band is Nightwish.  I need to see this place)

Go Finland

Oslo, Norway

(must connect Danny to his Viking heritage.)

Iguguo

Augsburg, Germany

(I want to eat a pretzel and sausage in the town square, and see the cathedral.  my dad loves this place and raves about it, and I want to see it.)

Travel Pod

Study Kali/ Panatuken in the Phillippines with Danny

(yes, really.  this would be for like a month before Europe in an ideal world... and would be so cool!)

Allfight

SO.  There is my life plan for the next five years.  

Yup, plan.  Expensive?  Yes.  Very optimistic?  Yes.  Possible?  With some penny pinching, planning etc, yes.  Absolutely.  Especially if we do it cheaply.